God blesses parents with children — mirrors.
~Roger Jacobs
Dear Dad,
It wasn’t until I became a mom that I could fully grasp the extent of love and learning that transfers between parents and children. As a kid, it seemed to me that all abundance, discipline, and teaching flowed from parent to child — I recognize and am grateful for everything you have done to guide me toward a beautiful life.
After your grandson was born, I watched and helped him grow from baby to toddler, toddler to teen, and teen to young man. I found I learned as much, if not more from him, than he from me.
You see… he mirrors me in many ways and reflects my own behaviors back to me… the good, and yes… some ugly. Seeing the good feels rewarding. Seeing smudges makes me want to clean up my act.
There are so many great character traits I have learned from you… generosity, honesty, perseverance — and most importantly — taking personal responsibility for my choices and my responses to whatever life tosses my way. As we both know, every life has its share of adversity. How we approach and handle the flow determines our direction. In large part, because of what I learned from you, I’ve built a good and honorable life.
In a fire-proof box I keep several letters you’ve written me. One letter is dated 11/15/89. Do you remember the used black Ford Escort you purchased to launch me into the freedom of an adult life? Two full, hand-written pages document the care and concern you put into making sure I was safe and that I understood the significance of having skin-in-the-game… I owed you $1553.92 when it became available to me — no interest.
You shared your experience of driving the little black car with its fancy red pinstripe. You cautioned that it didn’t have a lot of get up in 4th gear… if I needed to move, downshift to third. You cautioned me not to back into the fire hydrant by my apartment and to keep a stash of warm clothes, a spare key, and a flashlight in the car. If that’s not love, what is?
In many ways, I believe I learned to be a storyteller from you. Thank you for taking the time to create scrapbooks of my accomplishments when I was in high school. I have them and they bring me joy. Without your effort, those memories would be hazy or lost.
Thank you for contributing to Flourishing Fictions. You have always encouraged me to be the best version of myself… You could see the person I might become.
Love and Gratitude,
Gail Lynn
I too cherish and appreciate what my dad has taught and done for me through the years. Now that he is 92, I cherish every moment that I still have with him because you never know when his last day will be here on earth.
Of the many beautiful turns of phrase in this post, this is my favourite -
“Seeing smudges makes me want to clean up my act.”