Born Free, Yes

And then I got on the bus

I’m so tired of going to Abilene…..

I heard somewhere that if you really want to know why you’re here, look no farther than your biggest fear, and then run at it full force.

Yeah, whatever, I thought at the time, but the idea never left.

After years of writing, and dedicated attention from readers who have refused to let me default on myself, I’m lacing up my shoes and running at….

Controversy and conflict—oh my!
Did I really just say that out loud?

When I was a child, instead of openly asking my dad if I could go on a camping trip with the neighbors or sleep over at a friends, I’d write him a note.

Why?
Because I was afraid my request might upset him in some way and then I’d have uncomfortable feelings to deal with.
Interesting?
Can you relate on any level?
Whatever you do…don’t rock the boat or upset anyone!

It’s not that I’m tired of being a Good Girl or Wisconsin Nice, but I’ve come to learn that keeping heads tucked into shells is very, very bad—for all of us. In so doing, we allow pop culture to author our lives.
Our agreement takes us to Abilene when we don’t really want to go.

Author is the root of authority.
Who has your pen?

Here’s a short story that’s been a thorn in my side for years….

Two young mothers sat in a fast food restaurant booth with their toddlers. One toddler shook salt all over the table and floor while his mother didn’t seem to notice. When the other toddler picked up the pepper shaker and attempted to imitate his friend, his mother took the spice from his tiny fingers and told him, “No.”

The first toddler carried on with his salt shaking busyness while mothers 1 & 2 said….nothing.

Later, in the car, mother 2 explained to her charge that if he intentionally spilled pepper on the table and floor, not only was it wasteful, but somebody would have to come and clean up after him.

Why didn’t she say this out loud in the booth?
Well, she didn’t want anyone to feel bad.
Who was she to ask questions, or lecture about personal responsibility?

Outwardly, her lack of comment showed she was in agreement with flying salt, but not pepper?
Oh, Boy!

Does chaos within lead to chaos outside?
Really, what happens when we think one thing in our head, but say nothing (or the opposite) out loud?

Trips to Abilene—Agreement Fueled by Fear of Exclusion

I’ve been engaging with the work of Jerry B. Harvey—a supreme storyteller.
Harvey’s work has created a crisis within me. I can no longer be a turtle.
The world needs me to embrace Communication.
And….I’m pretty sure it needs you to do the same.
I and Thou

Setting aside egos melts monsters like turning on a light?
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I’ll no longer let words hurt me.
We can fuse our fragmented opinions for the greatest good.

Where am I going with this?
I have no idea, but at least I’m walking.
Want to come along?

References:
A brief introduction to the Abilene Paradox.
Jerry Harvey in his own words….two hours….worth every minute.
How Come Every Time I Get Stabbed In The Back, My Fingerprints Are On The Knife by Jerry B. Harvey